The technology landscape is ever-changing. It can be a great benefit to families but there are challenges associated with it as well. This digital tech guide is designed to help you have a proactive attitude toward keeping your child safe when using digital devices.
Setting Healthy Guidelines
The first thing parents need to do is to set healthy guidelines. This entails all parents or guardians getting on the same page about technology and then coming up with guidelines for their family. You need to ask questions like, "At what age should I allow my child to use this device?" "How much time can they spend on it?" "How will we protect them from inappropriate content and other dangers?" Here are some good guidelines you can use to start the process (adapted from https://bellshoals.com/parents/)
- Technology is a Privilege - Contrary to your child's belief technology is a privilege, not a right. This means that if guidelines are not followed then devices will be taken away. It also means that just because someone else can do something online or use a certain device your family may have a different standard.
- Devices Will Be Checked Regularly - A child should never be surprised when you ask to see their devices. Parents also should not become lazy in this task. Regular device checks can ensure children are staying on the right track with technology. It also helps create healthy accountability.
- Proper Etiquette Is a Must - Proper etiquette will not be instinctive for most children. You must teach them when to silence or turn off the phone– movies, restaurants, dinner table, etc. When in the presence of a person, that person takes precedence over any digital device. Often this example is set by the parents, they must model proper etiquette if they expect it from their children.
- Set Clear Expectations - Your child should not have to guess what you expect when it comes to devices. You must set clear expectations and communicate them to children. Make sure they understand you are doing this for their well-being because you love them and want to protect them. Simply communicating the expectation upfront will help pave the way to open dialogue about the digital world.
- We Will Not Keep Up With the Joneses - Just because a friend has a certain device or access to a certain app does not mean that your children have to have it as well. Parents reserve the right to approve or deny any app. They also will exercise built-in or add-on parental controls.
- Never Use Technology in a Hurtful Way - It is so easy to disassociate from actual reality that children must be reminded that Christlike behavior extends to the digital world. They must never say anything hurtful, bully, post embarrassing photos, etc. of other people. Never say anything that wouldn't be said in person over text or social media. Also, fake accounts should not be used.
- No Secret Passwords or Accounts - Parents will be given all passwords to devices and any app that requires a password. They must also be notified if a password is changed. This level of accountability helps the child to make good choices in the digital world.
- Everything Online is Public - Children must act like everything posted online will be there forever. Many employers and colleges will look at online presence when they are considering applicants. Social media posts have been used in this way many times.
- Time Limits Will Be Set & Devices Will Be Put Up at Night- Most devices today have parental controls that include time limits. Parents should decide how long a child should be allowed to use a device and then enact time limits. children do not need 24/7 access to devices. It is not healthy for them. They should also not be allowed to house devices in their room at night. There is a chance they can find a workaround to parental controls and use devices late into the night. Parents should set up a charging station in their bedroom or main area of the house and make the kids put their devices up at bedtime.
- Use Technology to Encourage - Finally, as with all things in life we should do everything to please the Lord. Our online usage should be used to glorify God and encourage others. Parents should model this behavior and help children to have a positive influence on others in the digital world.
Tutorials
Mobile Phones and Tablets
Never give a device to your child without setting up parental controls. Tech companies have come a long way and now offer robust parental controls. You can set up content filters, approved apps, downtime schedules, etc.
Apple Device Parental ControlsApple Device Video TutoriaL
Android Device Parental ControlsAmazon Fire Tablets Parental Controls
Gaming Consoles
You might be surprised to find that gaming consoles are one of the top ways kids communicate with friends and carry with them a potential for inappropriate content. Each machine has its own web browser that is not filtered or monitored and can be used to browse the internet. Kids can also chat and add “friends” from all over the world, some of which might be predators. As parents, you must enable parental controls on each gaming console.
Xbox Parental ControlsPlaystation Parental ControlsNintendo Parental Controls
Social Media
Parents need to think very carefully about allowing children or teenagers access to social media. It is wise to wait until they are teenagers or older (the one exception might be Facebook Kids Messenger). If you do allow it you need to monitor it very carefully. Each social media platform has its benefits and major risks. If left unattended, children can connect with anyone in the world and trade content, which might be inappropriate. Social media is an ever-changing landscape. New apps are coming on the scene all the time.
Social Media Parental Controls:|
YoutubeFacebook
Facebook Kids MessengerKids Messanger Video TutoriaL
InstragramSnapchatTikTok
Streaming
Streaming services are great! Endless amounts of media at the touch of a button; however, some of the content is not appropriate for children. Many streaming apps have the ability to add kids' profiles that will only allow appropriate content to be viewed. In addition, the primary account can only be accessed with a PIN.
Plugged-In Streaming Parental Controls Tutorials:
HuluAmazon PrimeDisney+
NetflixPeacockParamount+
Whole Home Internet Filtering
A great solution for filtering the internet is whole-home filtering. Any device that is on your network will be filtered and only allow content you set. This should be used in addition to parental controls. The only downside is if the device has a cellular connection it can bypass the WIFI; however, these solutions are easy and should be utilized by all parents. Some of the DNS blockers even have free options!
Single Device Internet Filtering and Accountability
Another great solution for content and internet filtering is a program on a single device like a laptop, tablet, or phone. Every filter is different and comes with pros and cons. Make sure to investigate and try different filters to see which one works for your family. Some of the software is just for accountability, which works great for older teens since you are trying to help them make good decisions as they grow older. It won’t block everything but will report everything to an accountability partner. Don’t think just because you add one of these that you are good, you must check your child's device from time to time. Kids have found a workaround for internet filters. For instance, if an app allows a Google account to sign in they can access a web browser even if you have disallowed it. Companies work to fix these workarounds but kids are smart and stubborn so you must be diligent to check devices occasionally.
Single Device Filters:|
barkCovenant Eyes Mobici p
Accountability Software:
everaccountableAccountable2you
CAUTION - Things to Watch For!!!
Some apps contain dangers that many parents are unaware of. Some kids use them to access inappropriate content, chat with people, hide apps, and go around filters. (adapted from https://bellshoals.com/parents/)
- Hidden File Apps – These apps come in the form of fake calculators, games, flashlights, etc. They can be used to access hidden files, photos, videos, and even internet browsers. You can find these apps in the app store by searching for ‘hidden files‘ or ‘hidden browsers.’
- Meme and Wallpaper Apps - Can contain inappropriate photos.
- Apps with In-App Browsers - In-App browsers are the ability to browse the internet from inside an app. It’s like having Internet Explorer, Chrome, or Safari built inside an app like Twitter or Facebook. For example, someone could tweet themselves a link to Google, then after clicking on the link have access to search Google from within the Twitter app. There is no history or tracking on in-app browsing.
- Games with Social Component - Examples: Words with Friends (or anything … with Friends), Clash of Clans. Some games can be used more for their chat and social components than gameplay.
- Texting or Chat Apps - Examples: Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok, WhatsApp, Kik, Facebook Messenger. Allows users to text and chat using Wi-Fi or a data connection. If you only check the main messaging app on the phone, you may not see everyone your child is texting.
- VOIP Apps (Voice Over IP) - Examples: Google Voice, Google Talk, Google Hangouts, Skype, Zoom. Allows users to set up (for free) separate phone numbers, texting, and voicemail. Uses data and Wi-Fi instead of traditional voice plans. With these apps, you can use an iPod or iPhone as an actual phone over Wi-Fi.
- VPN Apps – Kids can use VPN apps to bypass parental controls to access banned websites and online content. Some filter apps and parental controls can detect when a VPN is used.